The funny thread
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
Re: The funny thread
Adele vs. Kimi Räikkönen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7k_-wqzuJc
Kimi's famous team radio responses from the past few years
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7k_-wqzuJc
Kimi's famous team radio responses from the past few years
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
Re: The funny thread
A new church opened in the town and the vicar advertised for religious couples to join the church.3 couples responded to this and were interviewed by the vicar..who set them a test of abstaining from sex for 2 weeks...after which they met the vicar again.
The first couple..in their 70s said.."no problems..we never even thought about it"
The second couple in their 40s said.."it was ok after we got through the first week"
The third couple..newly married in their 20s....the young guy said "we were doing ok until she dropped the paint"
The vicar said"The Paint?"
Yes he said " She dropped a tin of paint and she bent down to pick it up..well she was wearing a short skirt..she showed all she had..I couldnt resist and we had sex there and then"
The Vicar said "Im afraid you are not welcome in my church after that"
The young guy said..."Thats ok..were not welcome in B & Q anymore either"
The first couple..in their 70s said.."no problems..we never even thought about it"
The second couple in their 40s said.."it was ok after we got through the first week"
The third couple..newly married in their 20s....the young guy said "we were doing ok until she dropped the paint"
The vicar said"The Paint?"
Yes he said " She dropped a tin of paint and she bent down to pick it up..well she was wearing a short skirt..she showed all she had..I couldnt resist and we had sex there and then"
The Vicar said "Im afraid you are not welcome in my church after that"
The young guy said..."Thats ok..were not welcome in B & Q anymore either"
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04
Re: The funny thread
A WARRIOR'S TAIL (PG)
http://www.bbfc.co.uk/releases/warriors-tail-film
Genre(s) Animation, Children, Drama
Company chose to remove a single use of strong language ('motherfucker') in order to achieve a PG classification. A 15 uncut was available.
http://www.bbfc.co.uk/releases/warriors-tail-film
Genre(s) Animation, Children, Drama
Company chose to remove a single use of strong language ('motherfucker') in order to achieve a PG classification. A 15 uncut was available.
- Shingster
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 4140
- Joined: 08 Sep 2006, 11:14
Re: The funny thread
Obviously somene at the BBFC has forgotten they've allowed f-bombs in PG rated films before, can't imagine the impact of the word has gotten stronger as time goes by - FFS! Weird their only option given was a 15 though, pretty sure it should be allowed in a 12A!
EDIT: Right there in their guidelines: http://www.bbfc.co.uk/education-resourc ... n/language
If the guidelines were followed they should only have offered a 15 rating if the f-bomb was dropped frequently throughout the film and this last one was a fuck too far!
EDIT: Right there in their guidelines: http://www.bbfc.co.uk/education-resourc ... n/language
If the guidelines were followed they should only have offered a 15 rating if the f-bomb was dropped frequently throughout the film and this last one was a fuck too far!
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04
Re: The funny thread
I think you missed the point of my post.
It's a children's animation!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4075322/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1
Besides, the BBFC have NEVER knowingly allowed the word 'fuck' in a 'PG' rated movie (only the MPAA have and not for over 20 years).
Strong language can be used in a 12(A) if infrequent and non-aggressive (I believe Absolutely Anything's six uses is the current record) -- but the exceptions are 'motherfucker' and 'cocksucker', a single use of which still gets you a '15'.
It's a children's animation!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4075322/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1
Besides, the BBFC have NEVER knowingly allowed the word 'fuck' in a 'PG' rated movie (only the MPAA have and not for over 20 years).
Strong language can be used in a 12(A) if infrequent and non-aggressive (I believe Absolutely Anything's six uses is the current record) -- but the exceptions are 'motherfucker' and 'cocksucker', a single use of which still gets you a '15'.
- Shingster
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 4140
- Joined: 08 Sep 2006, 11:14
Re: The funny thread
Children's animation is edgy now Mark, get fucking with it! I believe there have been instances of f-bombs in PGS with sound effects over them (car horn or whatnot) to reduce the clarity of what's being said, but I can't think of a PG example where there's a clear and blatant f-bomb.
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
Re: The funny thread
I think there's one in Big (1988), it was cut from the PG rated UK version
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
Re: The funny thread
Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick's Day. Mick, the bartender says, 'You'll not be drinking anymore tonight,Paddy’. Paddy replies, 'OK Mick, I'll be on my way then’. Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face. 'Shoite' he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off. He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face,
He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine. He belly crawls to the door andshimmies up to the door frame. He sticks his head outside and takes a deepbreath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.
'Bi'Gonners.... he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside. He takes a look up the stairs and says 'No fockin' way'. He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says 'I can make it to the bed'. He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face. He says 'Fock it' and falls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, 'Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit to drink last night?'
Paddy says, 'I did, Jess I was fockin' pissed. But how'd you know?'
'Mick phoned . . . you left your wheelchair at the pub.'
He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine. He belly crawls to the door andshimmies up to the door frame. He sticks his head outside and takes a deepbreath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.
'Bi'Gonners.... he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside. He takes a look up the stairs and says 'No fockin' way'. He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says 'I can make it to the bed'. He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face. He says 'Fock it' and falls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, 'Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit to drink last night?'
Paddy says, 'I did, Jess I was fockin' pissed. But how'd you know?'
'Mick phoned . . . you left your wheelchair at the pub.'
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
Re: The funny thread
America First, Finland Second
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yP9Qt-bSz40
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yP9Qt-bSz40
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
Re: The funny thread
Also
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
Re: The funny thread
I've just seen a TV for sale on Ebay, the listing said: 'TV for sale, £20, volume button is stuck on full.'
I thought 'I can't turn that down...'
I thought 'I can't turn that down...'
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
- grim_tales
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 22079
- Joined: 25 Oct 2004, 18:34
- Location: St. Albans, UK
Re: The funny thread
Paddy tells his wife "My bumhole is burning really bad, I've no idea what it is"
"Ring sting" says his wife.
"How the fuck would he know?!" replied Paddy.
"Ring sting" says his wife.
"How the fuck would he know?!" replied Paddy.
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
Re: The funny thread
Hulu has classified Rocky 4 as "love story"
I'm not making this up!
I'm not making this up!
- HungFist
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 11731
- Joined: 14 Dec 2005, 15:50
- Location: Japan
- Contact:
- Markgway
- Bruce Lee's Fist
- Posts: 20177
- Joined: 18 Feb 2005, 02:04