What general film/series have you just seen.. marks out of 5

[gasteropod]

I'd love it if Brad's gone through his whole life thinking turquoise is a purple colour

[Markgway]

[bradavon]

I thought you said purple, so shoot me.

[Markgway]

I thought you said purple, so shoot me.

Nah, I think Gas has it right.

[gasteropod]

Hellboy II: The Golden Army: Ohhh, del Toro, you do persist in annoying me with each film and yet still I watch out of morbid curiosity. Just throw everything in there why don't you, no consistency with the monsters, just anything someone designs will make it into the film and will make squeaking and roaring noises because that's what monsters do. Things just do things for no reason, the acting is embarrassing, ugh I didn't like the film basically.

[bradavon]

I though both Hellboy and Hellboy 2 were merely okay. Del Toro like plenty before shouldn't bother with Hollywood.

[saltysam]

The Last Exorcism 2/5

Charismatic preacher with the gift of the gab (early on he takes on a bet that he can slot in a banana cake recipe into his sermon) gets pangs of guilt after his son nearly dies,decides to film his final exorcism to expose his fake methods to the world.Ok but nothing great and resorts to cliches before the race with the devil type ending.

Piranha (2010) 2.5/5

Entertaining remake is pretty fast moving fun,from it's opening Jaws homage to it's over the top fish carnage,kelly brook tit shots amongst other things. if the sight of two piranhas fighting over which one is going to eat Jerry O'Connell's dick sounds like your kind of movie then give this a whirl.

[Markgway]

DATE NIGHT **

Gets off to a good start thanks to likeable leads and light tone... but sinks under weight of pedestrian direction and dull plotting. The actors are clearly (and desperately) trying to be funny with nothing but witless dialogue to work with. The action scenes are pants and don't belong in this movie. Talented actors like Ray Liotta and Mark Wahlberg are wasted in laugh free roles. They made screwball comedies better in the 1930s.

[saltysam]

Death Race 2 2/5

Surprisingly decent prequel to the Statham vehicle,with a decent cast and glossy,high production values which makes me think this may have originally been intended for cinema release rather than DTV. nothing original but well made and entertaining.

[Markgway]

KNIGHT AND DAY ***

Another screwball action comedy - but this one was a good deal more competant than Date Night. Had some laughs, mostly courtesy of Cruise, who appeared to be having a jolly good time, and nifty (if wildly improbable) stunts. Started to wear me out in the last half hour - possible overkill as a result of trying too hard - but it was likeable enough popcorn fare.

[saltysam]

Salt 3/5

Solid spy actioner starring Angelina Jolie as a possibly rogue c.i.a. agent.fast moving thriller doesn't outstay it' welcome at 100 minutes.there are Three! versions of the movie on the disc.Theatrical/Director's/Extended. i watched the DC.Apparently Tom Cruise swerved this one in favour of Knight & Day.He made the wrong decision imo.

[bradavon]

It looks like Sony choice to release it cut (12) in cinemas and uncut (15) on DVD/Blu-ray. Along with an additional Extended Cut. I'm guessing similar happened in America because the American discs also contain three cuts.

[Xenon]

Conan: The Barbarian (1982) - do I even need to leave a comment? It has Arnold in it. Ahhhhnoold. 8/10

[brooce-leroy]

Salt 3/5

Solid spy actioner starring Angelina Jolie as a possibly rogue c.i.a. agent.fast moving thriller doesn't outstay it' welcome at 100 minutes.there are Three! versions of the movie on the disc.Theatrical/Director's/Extended. i watched the DC.Apparently Tom Cruise swerved this one in favour of Knight & Day.He made the wrong decision imo.

Naaah, i wasn't keen on salt, and i think knight and day is far superior. one of the better films i've seen this year (its been a poor year).

[gasteropod]

Alien 3: The only good thing about this film is Sigourney Weaver's performance, most of the other actors are embarrassing and the CGI alien is shit, and what kind of an ending is that?! The BD transfer is more 'HD Ready' than 'Full HD' if you know what I mean.

[Markgway]

I've decided to alter my ratings system.
I'm going to use the Leonard Maltin scale (BOMB aka * - to - ****).
With that in mind...

DATE NIGHT **
KNIGHT AND DAY **1/2

and...

PREDATORS **1/2
Watchable series revamp takes most its cues from the original film and throws in a couple of surprises toward the end. No great shakes but if you like other Predator films there's no reason you won't find some enjoyment in this. On a side note: It's disgraceful that Alan Silvestri is given only a tiny credit at the end for "Predator Theme" when the entire score is his work reorchestrated. He should sue.

[bradavon]

Alien 3: The only good thing about this film is Sigourney Weaver's performance, most of the other actors are embarrassing and the CGI alien is shit, and what kind of an ending is that?!

Which cut did you watch? I was going to (finally) see the Work print soon, only DVD though. I'm happy with my Quadrilogy box set.

[gasteropod]

Theatrical, I'm going through them in their original cuts and then will watch them again in their special editions to compare.

[Yi-Long]

The Devil wears Prada... 3/5

Schoolgirl fantasy about Cinderella selling her soul to the evil stepmother. Anne Hathaway stars as the bright-eyed naieve innocent who gets hired for a prestigious job she doesn't actually, and rises through the ranks cause she's such a sweet hardworking girl...

Yeah...

Anyway, I don't want to spoil too much, but Streep is good in the role as stuck up snobby uber-bitch, and the rest of the cast are decent, if not anything special. It's hard to care for Hathaways character in the end, as she turns out to be quite a hypocrite.

Oh well, 3/5.

[HungFist]

The Devil wears Prada... 3/5

Schoolgirl fantasy

It sounded good for a moment

[Yi-Long]

The Devil wears Prada... 3/5

Schoolgirl fantasy

It sounded good for a moment

You know there's porn on the internet, right!?

[HungFist]

The Devil wears Prada... 3/5

Schoolgirl fantasy

It sounded good for a moment

You know there's porn on the internet, right!?

Porn is anti-kawaii. Doesn't make a good school girl fantasy

[bradavon]

There's no kawaii porn, for real? I doubt it.

[Markgway]

**Brad types Kawaii + porn into Google to check**

CRY OF THE OWL **1/2

Dark, engrossing thriller about stalking and obsession... unpredictible throughout but never quite satisfies in the end.

[brooce-leroy]

salt - average female bourne wannabe with all the best bits in the trailer

scott pilgrim - a bit let down by this one, as was expecting something more from it, but enjoyed it on a pure visual level. Although still annoying, mike cera proves quite adept at the fighting, although brandon routh's evil ex was my favourite, he should be in an alternative x-men or something.

last airbender - not as bad as reviews have made out, but just unremarkable. Reminded me of Golden Child.

the other guys - starts off well, but drags more than pricilla queen of the desert, and VERY hit and miss with the jokes. 4/10

the town - this is more like it. solid performances from affleck, jon hamm and co, slickly directed by the former Aff-lo, and well executed gunfights. The only problem is it that the plot is overly reminiscent of Heat, in other words, its not exactly original. But as a heist/drama/character study, it does the job. I was expecting maybe better (I seem to be always more demanding of movies these days) but it passes the time well. 7/10

Devil - this was unspectacular, but i guess it does what it says on the tin. It would be better suited to an episode of twilight zone or outer limits. I was intrigued all the way through, but instantly forgettable.

SUNDAY

The A Team - good fun, great cast, slightly lacklustre set-pieces (ranging from the mediocre to impressive, but uneven). The thing that stuck with me is that Jessica Biel is probably the most implausible high ranking official in a movie (and looking damn good in an army uniform) since Denise Richards was a rocket scientist. She just looks to darn hot for a captain in the Military Police (or DoD).

Knight & Day - I know this movie is not well regarded in many quarters, but for me its just such a breeze. I think accusations that it has a non existent plot is missing the point; its not really supposed to. It's almost a parody of the whole M:I, spy, Hitchcockian caper movies. Tom Cruise gets to cut loose from all the serious stuff he's been doing, and has more fun than he's had in years. Diaz is also clearly up for it all the way, and they make a brilliant double act. It worked for me anyway (even on this 2nd viewing).

The Sorcerer's Apprentice - great mystical fun for all the family that definitely put a spell over me

MONDAY

The Rebound - one of the better rom/com/drams of recent times. Zeta Jones is still hot and convinces as a MILF. John Scheider from smallville has an hilarious cameo as a gross date.

The Hangover - 2nd viewing and still hilarious

The Losers - Very enjoyable alternative to the A-Team, directed with panache, Chris Evans steals the show in this one. Another impressive turn from him (he was cool in Scott Pilgrim too). Jason Patric should also do more stuff like this, he had a nice balance of subtlety and OTT.

YESTERDAY

Zombieland - awesome.