"You know you've seen too many... when you..."

[tom2681]

Let's go:

You know you've seen too many Kung-Fu movies when you offer a cup of tea to a hobo down the street and ask:
"Can I be your disciple ?"

You know you've seen too many korean melodramas when you propose to carry on your back a friend who's hurt her ankle.
And you're always surprised when she slaps you and calls you a pervert.

You know you've seen too many Kung-Fu films when you arrive in Hong-Kong and the only cantonese you know is:
"Get ready to feel my drunken iron fist technique !".

You know you've seen Battle Royale too many times when you:
-remember all the students' names and numbers.
+the names of all the actors who played them.
And yet you can't remember your real-life best friend's last name (true story !)

You know too much about asian cinema when you hear this line in Twins Effect:
"There shouldn't be western vampires in Asia" and immediately you think of the Weinstein brothers.

You know you've seen too many japanese swordplay films when you:
-know exactly who the Shogun, Yagyu and Hanzo were.
-don't know who's the [insert your country's name] president in 2006.

You know you've seen too many OUATIC movies when:
-You want everybody to call you Wong Sifu.
-Your aunt Yee doesn't want to visit you anymore...she said something about Oedipus Complex...

[Yi-Long]

You know you've seen too many Wong Kar Wai movies when you start smoking in slowmotion...

You know when you've seen too many Wong kar Wai movies when real life just sounds boring without a narrative playing in the background of everyday life...

You know you've seen too many Jet Li movies when you, while being in a fight, decide to go for a 540 jumpig kick to the temple, instead of just punching the guy in the nose...

You know you've seen too many Stephen Chow movies when you notice yourself getting sexually attracted to big fat guys with moustaches, in drag...

You know you're taking asian cinema way too seriously, when Harvey Weinstein tops your 'most evil person in the world' list.

You know your an asian cinema freak when 'I'll ong-bak your ass' becomes a regular catchphrase around the house during arguments.

[BiscLimpkit]

You know you're a DVD Mystère addict, if someone who doesn't mention the country of origin is more likely to piss you off than someone who mugs you and steals your pants.

You know you take image comparisons too seriously if you start debating low bitrates vs grain in movies such as Twins Effect II.

[thelostdragon]

You know you've seen too many japanese swordplay films when you:
-know exactly who the Shogun, Yagyu and Hanzo were.
-don't know who's the [insert your country's name] president in 2006.

I know that, but not from the movies.

[Yi-Long]

You know your name is Grim when you think with every asian actor you see onscreen:' Isnt that Bruce Lee!?"

[tom2681]

And with every asian actress: "Isn't that Zhang Ziyi !?".

[Markgway]

That's because those are the only names Grim can remember!

[Markgway]

You know you've seen too much porn if you are in the bakery alone with the shop girl and fantasise about her locking the door.

Strip her naked, roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.

[grim_tales]

Thats not funny anymore Mark

[thelostdragon]

Love that quote though. But it's not funny if it isn't Bruce Willis saying it.

[Markgway]

Love that quote though. But it's not funny if it isn't Bruce Willis saying it.

A fellow fan of The Last Boy Scout.

"Her school picture was an aerial photograph"